The Adventures of Sirius Black!! (part TWO!)

Alright well ith second part is here!!!!



Once there was a Sirius. He was stuck. The big, powerful – and slightly ebil – headmaster man had made his stay locked up in his VERY ebil ancestral home that was a million times worse than Azkaban when he was left alone, in his opinion.

...

"I wish I could cook..." said Sirius, "The ebil muttering house elf is no good too."

...

...

...

Sirius sighed.

...

...

...

"FOOD!"

...

"Hey! The kitchen echoes! ECHO!"

...

Suddenly, there came the shuffling sound of footsteps. Sirius turned to see who was here and saw the very ebil muttering house elf that he was muttering about earlier.

"Stupid, useless master. Practically killing my mistress with his bad, bad ways. Oh, what my mistress would, blah, blah, blah..."

Sirius tuned out the ebil little muttering house elf when he realized that he was going to start ranting.

...

‘Hm. Maybe I can lock Kreacher in his cupboard...’ Sirius thought.

"Kreacher, go lock yourself in your room for an hour."

Without saying anything to Sirius, ebil, muttering house elf Kreacher began more of his signature muttering and stalked off to do his master’s bidding...

"That was really easy. I wonder why I didn’t think of it before... I should do it more often,"

Sirius continued talking to himself, "I thought Remus was going to come today. He said he’d be here at eleven. And now it’s... no wait.

...

...

...

Now it’s eleven o’one! Darn werewolf... making me wait in the ebil house..."

...

...

Sirius couldn’t think of what to say next so he began to repeat himself.

"Darn werewolf..."

"You wouldn’t be talking about me, would you Sirius?"

Sirius jumped and in doing so, the chair that he was leaning back in tipped over. Sirius crashed.
"Of course not Remus! Why would I say something so vile and terrible to my good ol’ buddy friend!"

Remus rolled his eyes and sat in the not tipped over chair. Sirius looked at the tipped over chair for a while.

...

...

To pick up, or not to pick up?

...

...

Sirius finally decided that he didn’t feel like picking up the tipped over chair and sat in the one opposite Remus.

"Remus, I’m bored! I want to go out!"

"No." Remus said flatly. They had had this conversation before.

"Bu–"

"Where’s Kreacher?"

"Oh you mean ebil, muttering house elf? I told his to go lock himself in his room for an hour."

"And he listened to you?" Remus was surprised.

"Yeah!"

"Huh. I wonder why we never tried that before."

Sirius smiled, then suddenly remembered that he was hungry because the authoress just remembered that he needed food.

"Hey! I know what we can do!"

"What? And it better not have anything to do with going outside!"

"That’s just it! We NEED to go outside to do this! It’s the only way!"

"What is it?"

"Food!"

"Huh?"

"Let’s go get some food!"

"We have food here."

"Oh, please! You and I both know that neither of us can cook! Come on! Please!"

"I’m sure we could throw something together." said Remus unconvincingly.

"The only time that there is something edible in this house is when the Weasely’s are here! Please!"

"But–"

"Please!"

"Well..."

"Please!"

"Fine."

"Please!"

"Siri–"

"Please!"

While Sirius continued to plead with Remus, the gears in his brilliant mind were desperately working, trying to come up with a plan to make Remus agree to go. Remus, on the other hand, was getting tired of Sirius interrupting him saying yes to going outside.

‘There has got to be a way to shut him up!’ Remus thought.

Suddenly and completely out of nowhere, Remus saw a skillet on the table. He smiled at the tempting opportunity that the authoress offered, but decided instead to solve his problem with out resorting to violence as the first resort. So he took out his wand and silenced Sirius.

"Y’know," Remus started, "I did say yes to going outside a while ago, but you kept interrupting me. And while you were interrupting me, I was thinking."

Sirius’s mouth formed the word ‘NO!’

"And I realized that there is a way for us to get food."

Remus got up and walked to the door.

"Wait here Sirius, I’ll be right back." And with that, Remus was gone. Off to get lunch for the two.

Sirius was, of course, still silenced through Remus’s talk and departure. He was throwing a silent fit, stomping his feet and acting very immaturishly, and when Remus left, he just sank to the floor and began silently whining and waiting for the return of Remus.


-- Up To No Good